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It took years for Davis, founder of The STD Project , which encourages awareness and acceptance of various sexually transmitted diseases, and spokesperson for Positive Singles , a dating site for people with STDs, to come to terms with the diagnosis she got at age When she was diagnosed with herpes almost three years ago, Whitney Carlson, 29, a social media editor in Chicago, had a similar reaction.
The infection, which is caused by the herpes simplex 1 and herpes simplex 2 viruses and passed via skin-to-skin contact, can show up as a cluster of sores on the mouth area or genitals. Around two-thirds of people worldwide under age 50 have herpes simplex 1, according to the World Health Organization , and around one in every six Americans between ages 14 and 49 has genital herpes, usually caused by herpes simplex 2, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.
Both Davis and Carlson eventually moved past their initial panic and saw herpes for what it is: an infection many people have that happens to usually get passed through sexual contact. In the past, Carlson would put the herpes conversation on the table quickly. On sites like Positive Singles and HMates , users are expected to be open about their diagnoses, but because they know everyone else there has an STD, too, it removes a huge barrier—and the question of whether the information will send a potential partner packing.
Carlson, who got back into dating via this kind of site after her diagnosis, agrees. You can have great sex , find love, and also cut down on the chance of passing herpes along to your partner, Triplett says. Just keep these few things in mind:. Dating with herpes means telling potential partners, which can be scary. How to tell your partner is up to you, but people with the virus say it helps to be direct, transparent, and patient.
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